My youngest son will be sixteen in July, so we decided on buying the Grande Jeep Cherokee early so he could learn on what he would be actually driving. He has completed the Driver’s Ed class at school and obtained his learners permit on his first try! This actually is a big deal because out of our five boys total, only two passed the learners exam at the DMV the first time. If you miss any of the traffic signs, which are first, you are kicked out with a fail! So, knowing that, this kid was prepared! He was ecstatic at his success and yes I did make him take the Mom and Son selfie with the pasted test paper! The DMV in Virginia mails you the actual picture licence in the mail.
We really haven’t taken him on any country roads for practice or any parking lots prior to this! BAD parents! However, I’ve heard that my oldest son did let him drive his car a few times, so I had no idea what to expect while teaching him. Below are the items you will need while attempting to log your son’s practice hours.
1. A very good, tight, seat belt.
2. A hold on for dear life bar, jeep’s are great because they have these.
3. A neck brace. (If you don’t wear this, you will be put in my position of asking my Doctor for a muscle relaxer, due to the fact that I could not move my NECK)
4. Post a driving schedule on social media so people know where your going to be driving so they can stay away from that area completely.
5. Let your neighbors know that should all back up their mailboxes about a foot from where they currently are.
6. I’m looking for a flag or a sign that says, “Student driver in training”. I’m doing this to avoid the terrified stares I’m getting from other drivers.
7. A sedative, or a glass of wine for after the lesson is over.
8. A piece of styrofoam to put under your right foot as your imaginary break to keep yourself from injuring your foot due to the stomping, styrofoam should be good because it has some “give to it”.
9. Try to employ someone else to do it.
10. Try to get your husband, Father, or basically any man you can find. Men tend to deal with this better.
Don’t get me wrong, I am thrilled come October 22nd my son will be able to drive himself, thus eliminating the chauffeur service I usually provide to here, there, and anywhere. At the same time, I’m TERRIFIED! This is my last baby behind the wheel of a car. Any Mother who says she is not worried about her child driving is either highly medicated, or has insanity issues! It seems like just last week he graduated from middle school to high school. These milestone’s while important, can make the best Mother cry knowing he is growing up way TOO fast, and even though he sometimes makes me crazy, I cannot even start to imagine him packing his bags for college and leaving me! It will look something like this – This is my BABY even though he towers over me at over six feet tall! Don’t worry, my highly qualified shrink and I are discussing this on a regular basis to prepare me for that day. Since it is two and a half years away, this might be enough time for me to start in dealing with it. The picture below is how it would be if I didn’t always demand the two arms hug. This is a requirement.
While on the subject at least, my youngest still does want to hang around Mom, and still does ask what is for dinner 800 times from when he walks in the door from school to when it’s actually served! My nineteen year old is definitely like this –
Credit for both comic strips go to Zits, they are hysterical and you can check them out at www.cartoonistgroup.com.
In short raising teenagers is hard work. Their hormones coupled with yours as the Mom are enough to send any sane person into a padded cell for weeks at a time. I have to remember that this is all normal, and probably payback for the pain in the a** I was to my parents! They are so sure that they know everything, and by the third one, YOU know everything about what the are going to TRY and get away with and are a bit more savvy in dealing with these situations. TIP Screaming into a pillow can help your nerves. Trying to remain calm, cool, and collected with not always prevail, and you might have to resort to such terror tactics like, “If you do not make the honor roll, your cell phone will not make it back into your pocket!” After all, you are the Mom, the parent, it is your job to protect them, guide them, love them, and raise hell if they screw up too much. It is not always a popular job, it’s not always fun playing police to curfew times, “friends” of theirs that are not good influences,and making sure you hear their voice instead of letting them get away with always texting. I firmly believe it is way more important to be around the house if you can while they are going through these years. So many parents think they need to be there when they are babies and toddlers, and that is true to some while nursing, and forming that bond with your child. However, if you have to go back to work – at that age is the BEST time. Save up and become the stay at home Mom, or work at home Mom when they are in High School. When they are accepted into college, and have made it through these years with minimal scars, they will Thank You for it. Obviously not at the time you are actually doing it, but later in life they will be glad Mom had their back and tried her hardest to lead them into the right direction.
***Sidebar – NEVER hang up the phone without telling them how much you love them. Text it to them as much as you can. They may find it annoying now, but later on they will look back at their childhood and know in their fullest heart that their Mom loved them. You cannot buy the kind of self-esteem it gives them, or the peace of mind it gives you.
This Blog is dedicated to my boys. I am proud of them all. This blog is also dedicated to my girlfriends who are great Mom’s, including one’s that took on children that were not their own!
The Mask of the Doctor’s Wife…aka…Mom, and Moma