There is such a thing called being a Mother. It’s not a part-time job and it doesn’t end when your children turn eighteen. There are really bad people out there who will try to manipulate them. They will try tactics like being nice, saying nice things to gain their trust, and basically attempting to worm their way into their lives and possibly yours. Some basic signs to look for when approaching a possible predator.
FACEBOOK PAGES – How many adults over the age of forty that are not related to the family or a good friend of the family approach your children on Facebook and try to engage them in conversation? If this is happening to your child or your young adult, this person could be a predator. Does this people engage others in your child’s life in an effort to gain information about them? If they review their friend list and try to engage those kids or young adults as well, you should definitely be concerned of the intentions of this person. After all what grown adult that is not tied to the family or a good friend of the family does this? It’s creepy and totally inappropriate. The way they react when approached will tell you everything you need to know about their intentions. If you have asked them nicely to stop and they are a normal person, they will respect the parents and stop this behavior on their own, and will probably even apologize. Watch out if the below happens.
IF THIS PERSON GETS ANGRY WHEN YOU APPROACH THEM ABOUT THEIR INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR WITH YOUR YOUNG ADULT/CHILDREN AND STARTS NAME CALLING AND USING ABUSIVE LANGUAGE –
This is a GIANT red waving flag. Document this conversation. If you have kindly and nicely asked them to stop this behavior and they respond with anger, start name calling the parents, other children in the family and above all refuse to respect your request involving your child, this person obviously has a serious screw loose. Take action immediately.
WHAT TO DO –
Did you know that abusive language and profanity is a crime? Document the conversation, your cell phone carrier can assist you with this. If this predator has a documented history of abuse, and you have had to seek such actions of blocking them from your phone, Facebook page, and social media, do not permit this person to have any contact with the people you love. The time for being nice is OVER. Tell them in VERY CERTAIN terms that they are to cease and desist this contact. Both parents, still married or divorced need to send a united message that this behavior will not only stop immediately, but if it doesn’t you can take your evidence to your local Magistrate and have a Judge sign off on a restraining order. Their IP address will be attached to their cell phone and their computer. Take this information along with any angry abusive texts with you when you go to seek action against this person. Do not worry about being the nicer, better person at this point. Rising “above it” is not going to help this situation. This person is unstable, and could be capable of more than you realize.
In today’s technology of cell phones and social media you can NEVER to be too careful when your kids are concerned. Life sometimes does get a little messy. Don’t let this worry of making a mess keep you from being the good parent that you are. Your kids will thank you for it.
aka….Mask of the Doctor’s Wife